Training Hearts: Reflections from a Mom of Two Under Two

I’m writing this post while watching my two littles sleep. It’s in these moments that I finally get alone time—it’s in the silence that I find myself weeping over my children in prayer.
I am blessed with two “two & under.” So, any parent reading this understands why bedtime is really my only quiet time. While I watch them sleep, I often catch myself asking, “Was I a good parent?”

Realizing that we have such a great responsibility to raise such beautiful beings triggers my anxiety. It doesn’t help that during my “me time,” I’ll scroll through social media and see culture steering away from God's truths.

How can I make sure my kids protect their faith? Emphasis on the possessive pronoun.
I want my kids to make their faith theirs. That is what I pray for often.

Nature, Nurture, and the Garden of Faith

In child development classes, I’ve learned that kids become who they are by both “nature and nurture.”
We can’t control their nature, but we can definitely nurture them. I read a parent blogger mirror parenting to gardening. We provide for their needs and take out the weeds. We watch them grow, understanding that “how they’ll turn out” is entirely up to God.

The Bible says in Proverbs 22:6, “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.”
That verse hit differently when I had my first kid. Training takes time. Training takes work. Training starts young.

Growing up, I thought that verse meant that “training” children would yield a “specific result.”

I would hear people question, “How come so-and-so is faithful in church, and yet their kids chose otherwise?” In the same breath, they would accuse a parent of “failing to train their kids,” speaking as if success and failure were theirs to deem, and acting like “results” of parenting could be so easily procured.

Becoming a parent, I came to a whole new angle to that proverb. The Bible never says that the child will “become what you want them to be.” But the Bible says that they won’t depart from it. That pronoun refers back to the “training” part.

It clicked for me. I look back and credit much of who I am to the way my parents trained me. There are many things I do simply because that’s what I was taught, and it stuck with me—and I chose not to depart from it.

Everyday Discipleship: Practical Habits for Building Faith

Kids will remember the things we teach them. They remember the alphabet, how to use the potty, how to eat, how to clean up their toys, etc. They remember going to church. They remember the meals you cook. From core ideologies to everyday bits, parenting will undoubtedly make a lifetime impact.

Each day, our children are building their worldview. And we, as parents, want to teach them the ways that have helped us get through life. As Christians, we want them to discover the joy, the peace, and the love that comes from having a genuine, personal relationship with Christ.

Several years ago, I trained for a half-marathon. Oof. It was not easy. It took work. It took time. I needed to set a goal and take action. That’s what training is.

If our goal is that our children develop a personal faith in Christ and later be able to protect that faith against the weeds of the devil, then we need to set a goal and take action. We need to help them develop some good habits.

In Habits of the Household: Practicing the Story of God in Everyday Family Rhythms, Justin Earley says, “The normal is what shapes us the most, though we notice it the least.”

So, what are normal things I can do to help develop and protect my kids in today’s culture?

Speak & sing scripture often.

I love playing fun kids’ Christian music. That might sound super traditional, but I know that this has opened so many teaching opportunities for me. I’ll play a simple song from YouTube that uses Bible truths, and my kids love it! My 1-year-old will dance while my 2-year-old sings along. It’s such a sweet moment of worship for all of us! Imagine hearing the kids sing the words, “Do to others as you would have them do to you” (Luke 6:31). That truth comes in handy when they start fighting over the same toy!

Singing scripture truths is such a fun way to help them internalize God’s Word. Sing along with them and talk to them about scripture. Memorize scripture with them. Deuteronomy 6:7 says, “And thou shalt teach them (God’s statutes) diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house…” Remember, this training thing is gonna take diligence.

Secure time with your kids.

This one is tough. My husband is a chaplain for the U.S. Navy and is currently deployed, which means I find myself busy juggling solo-parenting life. It's easy just to leave the TV on so I can “get things done.” But TV time is still worldview-building time. Are they learning more from television than they are from me? Scary thought. I need to make time for my kids. Even my husband fights the time changes and tries to call every day to pray with the kids. We can’t train them if we’re not there for them.

Set an example.

Another “toughy,” right? I get so convicted of this. Do my kids see me read the Bible and pray? Do they want to go to church because they see that I want to go to church? Or is church a hassle? How much of our relationship with God is evidenced to them? Will my kids want to live the Christian life because of me? Or will they only see hypocrisy? If Jesus isn’t real to me, how can I tell them to make Him real for themselves?

Savor the moments.

Early childhood is typically referred to as the period from birth to 8. That’s eight short years to develop their cognitive, social, emotional, and even spiritual ideologies. I don’t want to squander these years. But I also want to enjoy these years. I want my children to have fun learning and growing with me.

There are so many ups and downs in parenting, but the ups surely outweigh the downs. Again, training isn’t easy, but having fun makes it a lot easier. Hug them to sleep and say a prayer. Color with them and share stories. Play dinosaurs with them and be a little silly. A pastor once said, “Parent with passion.”

Set apart time for God.

I know that’s “so vanilla.” But I know I struggle when my days go by without spending time with Him. My battery runs low. My patience goes out the door. And I just can’t do it on my own. I need the sunshine of His love, the warmth of His grace, the strength of His wisdom—all day, every day.